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Tue Nov 25 06:42:38 GMT 2008

Now that's funny right there I don't care who you are.

Louis N. Molino, Sr. CET
FF/NREMT/FSI/EMSI
Typed by my thumbs on my iPhone.

On Nov 24, 2008, at 16:09, ALS79 at aol.com wrote:

> For Immediate Release:
>
> New Technology Eliminates the Need for Medical Helicopters.
>
> New technology eliminates the need for dangerous and frequently  
> misused
> aeromedical transport missions. Announcing the availability of the  
> KellowCo
> Electromagnetic EMS Railgun (EMEMSRG). Experts uniformly agree that  
> the all-weather,
> hypervelocity EMS transport system will save millions of lives.
>
> When evenly dispersed on rail cars throughout a geopolitical  
> jurisdiction,
> EMEMSRG's can be easily accessed by EMS personnel in order to  
> rapidly propel
> seriously injured patients to appropriate receiving facilities - in  
> as fast as 7
> miles per second.
>
> The 700 lb., 8 ft. Titanium patient transport sabot (PTS) utilizes  
> the latest
> military GPS guidance technology to allow for pinpoint targeting.  
> The PTS is
> specially treated to withstand the aerothermal environment of  
> hypervelocity,
> as well as any conceivable weather conditions.
>
> The PTS is festooned with flush-imbedded coaxial superconducting  
> dipole
> magnets, which facilitate its 800+ mile range. And, the PTS is  
> reusable because it
> can be easily mopped clean of any remaining human debris at each  
> receiving
> facility (in the event of an untoward energy transfer or other  
> kinetic mishap).
>
> The company also announces the availability of its companion produce  
> - the
> KellowCo PTS Recovery Net, which is a 60 X 60 ft. hyper-elastic net  
> that can be
> easily erected at receiving hospitals.
>
> KellowCo, finally, announces the production of its EMEMSRG Users  
> Manual,
> "Train the Trainers" course syllabus, patches, decals and secret  
> decoder rings.
> Upon course completion, each student will be certified in the use of  
> the EMEMSRG
> as an Advanced Electromagnetic EMS Railgun cardholder (recertification
> required annually). And, be the first to promote rule and  
> reimbursement changes at
> the state and national levels in order to ensure that as many lives  
> as possible
> CAN BE SAVED!
>
>
>
>
> **************
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